Here’s a little list of what mine has said:

“You can’t afford it.”

“It’s just ONE cookie.”

“You really were thirsty for that soda.”

“You’ll just have to buy bigger pants.”

“She married you, she knew what you looked like.”

“It’ll be a while before you’ll need to get on the ground with grandchildren.”

“Just buy better supportive sneakers for walking long distances.”

“Don’t forget to ask for a chair without arms.”

“You deserve that 2nd bowl of ice cream.”

“But cheese sticks are your favorite, why should you deny yourself?”

“You can’t afford it.”

This is literally just a small example of what has gone through my head any time I’ve decided that it’s time to lose weight, take care of me and eat healthier. I swear, I have full blown conversations with myself daily. I like to think of it as having a staff meeting. The only difference now is that I am at the head of the table, slamming my fist down and demanding self respect. I’m not sitting on the sidelines anymore letting the voices run me. And believe me.. they ran me. I could justify EVERYTHING. One cookie turned into 6. The pants got bigger and bigger. Ice cream is my favorite, just a small 2nd scoop won’t kill me.

I have been fighting demons most of my adult life. Feeling inadequate. Feeling depressed about my weight. Feeling embarrassed because, on more than one occasion, I had to ask for a chair without arms or inside seating because there were those horrible resin chairs (YOU KNOW THE ONES!!!) that are death traps for overweight people. Seeing a bumper sticker that said “No fat chicks allowed” and wanting to slam into the back of that car. While that last one sounds extreme, it’s true. I hate those bumper stickers and if you have one, please kindly remove it from your car. It’s demeaning. Just sayin.

But I digress ….  When I joined 13 Stripes I just showed up for my intro with Joleen and, having done the budget with my wife beforehand, I joined.  Just like that. I knew that if I left that building without joining I would continue to sit on the side of the table while all those voices swirled in my head in big word bubbles and any confidence and strength I had to change my life would vanish. Listen, I get buyers remorse if I buy a shirt at the thrift store that was on sale for $2. I’m the queen of feeling guilty about spending money on myself. At the same time, and with my wifes INCREDIBLE love and support, I knew I needed to do something, anything to change my body and my health.

The minute I joined I moved the seat at the conference table in my head to the top of the table and said “I’m in charge now.”  (Did anyone else read that as “I’m the captain now!” or was that just me?) I put myself first and told those voices to sit down and shut up. So far, they’ve been pretty good.  A few have tried to sneak in there and speak but I shut them down pretty quickly now.

Listen, it’s not cheap to take care of yourself. Those globo-gyms aren’t for everyone. Yes, they’re cheap but if you’ve joined one and don’t go or keep saying “You’ll get back one day, after the summer, after vacation, etc etc.. ” please know that I know this:  You WON’T. I don’t mean that to sound disrespectful but I’ve been in your shoes, I know those lines like the back of my hand. We lie to ourselves and then we keep eating or keep sitting on the couch.  I. HAVE. BEEN. THERE. I know what I speak of.   I’m not saying come to 13 Stripes and give them ALL your money. I’m saying come for the No Sweat Intro and be open and honest about what you need AND about your finances and then watch your life change.  Watch yourself as you go to the head of the table and take over.  (Picture Joan Crawford at the head of the table at Pepsi after her husband died and they tried to push her out.)

You can do this. I believe in you. Come workout with me!

See you at the box!

#fromcouchtocrossfit #mystandardsmyway #thevoicesinmyhead #headofthetable #dontmesswithme #13stripesfitness